Ewige Mooenkraft!
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How can a bunch of cows afford a website? Lucrative
business operations, of course. It's the Cows, Inc. holds
a diverse stock portfolio, controlling many well-known
national and multinational corporations.
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"The secret to Kemps?
It's the Cows." It's the Cows, Inc. actually. Our first
foray into the business world seems so obvious. Who are we
kidding? Of course it was obvious.
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Ben
& Jerry's opposes rBGH. It's only natural that
we would take an interest in them. Why ask for government
subsidies for our rBGH production when we can make even more
money while rBGH is a controlled substance? Somebody has
to carry the banner.
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Got
Milk? We do. Cornered the market, in fact. And you
don't even realize what a big deal it is.
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RedBull.
Did you ever wonder where "Taurine" actually comes from?
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Gateway
Computers has done more to bring cows into the American
consciousness than any other business in the last decade.
Because they're a friendly midwestern company? Nope.
Wonder why they just changed their slogan? In Gateway
country, cows rule. |
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And of course, the San
Francisco Cow Palace, from whence we've quietly
manipulated the world since 1941. You won't see us listed
among the long-term tenants, though.
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